1. St. John’s College v. Thoroughly Modern Marketing



    It’s a truth I’m only just beginning to acknowledge that the one place where people who otherwise pride themselves on considerate, rational dialogue may get their panties unduly in a wad is with regard to the college they attended.

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    Well said. Thanks.


  2. how not to be a male feminist / male feminist ally

    1. Him: The only a term of endearment that I use towards strangers that I can think of is "beautiful" but I reserve that for people that I think need that compliment at that moment. Someone use clearly having a bad day or is clearly negative about themselves something like that and I'll just point out that I think they're beautiful if I find something of beauty in them So I don't just say it to say it, and I don't say it to hit on somebody. I point out that I think somebody is beautiful because it's an act of love towards a fellow human being and I believe in that sort of thing
    2. Me: Do you show such love to fellow male human beings?
    3. Him: Of course but I don't call many beautiful. Usually with a guy it's something a little bit different and I'll pay them a compliment about skill or a job they do. With man I think the word beautiful is a little different
    4. Me: why do you think that is?
    5. Him: I don't like being called beautiful. I am uncomfortable with being called beautiful but I have been called that
    6. Me: How do you know the women you call "beautiful" aren't just as uncomfortable as you are with it?
    7. Him: It's not really sexist to say a woman is a work of art and guys aren't
    8. Me: it is sexist. it's forgetting that the reason we see it that way is a sexist society obsessed with male desire for women. we don't consider female desire for men at all. How do you know that you finding them beautiful will make their day better? Especially given that most men who run around calling women beautiful are, 99% of the time, not doing it out of some kinds of selfless love for humanity. Just because you think something is an act of love doesn't mean that the other person sees it that way. We don't exist in a magic bubble based on our good intentions, we exist in context.
    9. Him: When I have done it ( not that often ), it has never been taken the wrong way
    10. Me: You can't really know that your compliment wasn't ever taken in the "wrong way". She might have smiled and thanked you politely because that's what women do. We're socialized to be polite especially when strange men approach us. If we aren't, we face the potential for escalation of the situation. I know I've smiled and walked away from a situation where a dude felt his appreciation of my looks was important for him to tell me where I've been angry afterwards, because my looks aren't the most important thing about me, least of all a man's approval of them.
    11. Him: Okay, so apparently I'm a sexist despite endeavoring everyday to lift up others and spread love and peace. Well this is a drag. So thank you
    12. Me: I didn't say you were a sexist. Please do not shove words in my mouth. One can be anti-sexist but have unexamined bits of sexism in thought and words and action. I'm being corrected every day myself and I openly post about it.
    13. Him: Strange part is I am a huge feminist, my first wife turned me into one.
    14. Me: Right! And part of being feminist is learning every day how little bits of societal brainwashed sexism are a part of all of us, and we can endeavor to do better. That's the only reason we're having this conversation. If you were a sexist, I wouldn't bother. Complimenting women for looks and men for action is one of those little things, or so I thought, rather than any kind of condemnation of you. My apologies if it came off that way.
    15. Him: I march at pro choice rallies and block the catholic protesters at clinics from harassing women going in, I was even recognized by a member of a former parish and ratted out to my priest, I guess I'm more of a human twitch a heart than a catholic though.
    16. Me: You don't need to prove yourself to me. This isn't about all those other worthy actions, or proving your worthiness as a person. I never called you a sexist. I thought part of being committed to equality and being a good feminist is to keep improving rather than doing something and then using it as proof you're a good feminist. In my view, it's a process. If you disagree, then I'm sorry I tried to have a discussion and wish you all the best.
    17. Him: The word beautiful is just that, it's a word. I think you are beautiful. You accepted my friend request, I glanced at your pictures and was able to get an idea of your background, how far you've come and what you stand for...You are a remarkable beautiful human being.
    18. Me: Okay, please stop trying to change the subject. Complimenting me will not change how I feel about this. I'm just asking that you maybe think about why you compliment women on looks and men on action.
    19. Him: you are being a little defensive and deadest on a position rather than listening to a unique perspective and motivation.
    20. Me: You're not as unique as you think in this, unfortunately. I am not defensive. I'm not the one trotting out my credentials and claiming someone called me something they most certainly did not.
  3. saturdaychores:

    Saturday Chores #5, June 14, 2014

    Grayson and I were out of town for a few weeks to celebrate the occasion of our marriage, but when we returned, there were still lots of people and lots of signs.

    This marks the first (and probably only) time our slogan was approved by the others. I learned about how Jesus will come back and slay everyone who is a disbeliever, including Grayson and me. That doesn’t sound very nice but I did tell the guy that if he liked the sign he was welcome to stand beside me. He walked away. 

    This makes me so very very happy.

  4. exhijabifashion:

    All Mine— Leila’s Story

    While growing up in the United States, I was constantly bombarded by images of the “ideal” beauty: models and actresses, who were taller and thinner than me, with fair skin and delicate European features.  I was noticeably different; being a petite South Asian, with naturally tan skin and an “interesting” face, which many admitted was pretty, in an “exotic” way.  But I never saw anyone in movies or magazines who looked like me, so I began to question how attractive I really could be.

    I also often wondered how my life would have been different if I had just been like the majority of my classmates: White and Christian.  Though the latter was a loose term for most, really just indicating that they would have family over around Easter and Christmastime. I was jealous of all the fanfare surrounding their holidays, and I was jealous of their freedom.  The freedom to wear what they want, study and explore their interests, and date and marry whomever they choose. 

    While my parents are considered “moderate” Muslims, they are quite conservative next to the typical American parents.  They immigrated to the States from Pakistan, bringing along with them the religious and cultural norms they were raised with.  No drinking, smoking, consuming alcohol or pork was allowed, and they expected their children to behave accordingly, all while avoiding premarital sex and romantic relationships with non-Muslims. 

    As a woman however, there were a few more rules that I had to adhere to that didn’t apply to my brothers.  I wasn’t allowed to show my knees or shoulders in public or at home.  Tank tops, mini skirts, and bikinis were out of the question.  Lengthy dresses still had to be loose fitting and opaque.   Even in the privacy of my own room, and my own bed, I was expected to cover my arms and legs.  There was also no swimming in gym class, no dancing with boys, no sleepovers, no dating, and no kissing allowed.  As you can imagine, the rules made it extremely difficult to be accepted as a “normal” kid.

    For years, I have tried to fit in.  I have tried to pass as the All-American girl-next-door.  But I am not her.  And I will never be her.  Finally, I now realize that I don’t need to be.  My experiences have made me an interesting, unique, strong, and ambitious person.  I have value just as I am and I am beautiful just as I am.  And I will not censor myself for any man or god or society.

    One day, when I am financially able, I will leave my parents’ home and be free to wear whatever I want.  My body, my behavior, my relationships, my career, my marriage, and my future will be mine. ALL MINE.  

    Maybe I’ll be an actress or a model or a writer.  Maybe I’ll be on TV and in magazines and a little brown girl will see me and think to herself that she can do anything.

    I don’t know.  All I know is that the future will be mine, and I will do as I goddamn well please.

    Leila* is a 23-year-old closeted ex-Muslim living in the United States.  Her identity has been concealed given her personal circumstances.  Any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, is probably coincidental. 

    *- Name has been changed.

  5. shonilane:



    same shit, different decade. 😒

    oh shit

    But, folks wanna act like this is new…

    (Source: pusssybow, via hello-rossalyn)

  6. bettersupes:

    "Little Girls Are Better At Designing Superheroes Than You" is a small project where I draw superheroes based on the costumes of young girls.

    This original submission is The Curly Girlie!

    From the mother: “Her superhero is named The Curly Girlie. She uses her long curly hair to lasso the bad guys, and has laser vision.”

  7. Police. He’s doing it right.


  8. In other words, if we didn’t live in a rape culture in which all but the most “perfect victims” are doubted, you can bet your ass there wouldn’t be such a backlog. As Hargitay said, “To me, this is the clearest and most shocking demonstration of how we regard these crimes.”

  9. lifewithamohawk:


    The correct answer is………

    Fucking NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!

    This disturbs me

    (Source: bonitabreezy)


  10. "

    It is difficult to be sat on all day, every day, by some other creature, without forming an opinion on them.

    On the other hand, it is perfectly possible to sit all day, every day, on top of another creature and not have the slightest thought about them whatsoever.


    Douglas Adams

    this quote was literally in my sociology book 

    (via marinashutup)

    (via brutereason)